I never managed the Bonaduces. (See here.) Though when, à la the Ramones, each band member got a nom de Bonaduce (Jon Bon Bonaduce, Koopie Bonaduce, Rusty Bonaduce and BoBo Bonaduce) those surrounding the band got their names too. While one friend of the band was dubbed Meredith-Baxter Bonaduce, I got to be Kincaid Bonaduce, though I claimed John Sinclair Bonaduce could work too. I was as successful at feigning managerial skills as I was as attempting to be as a singer/guitarist/bassist/drummer/pianist/ukuleleist. So I ended up a music blogger, the literary equivalent of playing tambourine.
Speaking of me and instrumental talent, I did, to take credit where minuscule amounts of credit may or many not be due, assist the Bonaduces in their the next leap of proficiency. I hooked them up with percussionist extraordinaire Chris (what was his Bonaduce name again?) when their first drummer, Rusty, went AWOL. When I said that the Bonaduces needed a drummer, he leapt at the opportunity. When asked if he could play drums (he was playing guitar in an industrial metal band at the time) he said, "To be a Bonaduce, I'll be a drummer." With Chris, who duct taped his hands so he could play with the drive of early Stewart Copeland, the entire band changed, intensifying on just about every level.
So to document the Bonaduces' ascent, especially the terse, berserk,"Everything's Rachel", I decided to put out a single myself. My entire oeuvre as a record mogul at No Glory Records is laid out before you in this post. But what a one-off! All four songs (10:01 in total) are flat-out rockers with rousing choruses. Lyrically, the songs are exemplary Doug first-person narratives, whether in teen-girl mode ("Introducing the New Rachel Jones") or benevolent stalker mode ("Judy Blume Weekend). Plus you get the pop-pop-punk "Hunt and Peck", which has an infectious 2-3-4- backing vocal hook and the band even name-checks itself!
Re-up on Rapidshare
Download Everything's Rachel 7" (lyrics included)
(MRML recommends WinrRAR for unpacking your downloads)